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Welcome on board CYB-R-lines !!! Part 1

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  • Welcome on board CYB-R-lines !!! Part 1

    Yes this is some fiction involving a fictional airline trading as Cyber lines/ways
    The location would be anywhere in either North America or Europe
    The story is a mix-up of real facts and fictional ones.
    Enjoy (or hate) the reading
    Comments off course welcome ....

    Worsening news were developping outside as a thickening layer of fog blanketed the airport. Lack of suitable vertical and horizontal visibility led the airlines to either delay their flights, indefinitely off course or simply cancel them. Despite our misery, we passengers due for flight CBR 3133 were among the luckiest ones should the events would at last develop in our favour.

    The mid-sized Boeing 757-200 allocated to our flight was already at gate as late during the previous night, she normally concluded her workload. Observing the high-heeled mighty twin-jet brought its share of fun. Cyb-R-lines is notoriously cash strapped, but there were some facts which were worth their weight in gold. The aircraft was in an almost all white finish with a grey belly and all yellow fin betraying some former days with Condor Flugdienst, Germany's top leisure and charter airline. Showing up above the windows line were the company titles "CYB-R-LINES" albeit in rather microscopic size !!! When reading the registration D-UMMY, I better understood why the airline made its best not to expose itself with more visibility.

    Waiting for a flight is usually not a problem. As a compulsive plane crazy, I indulge in picturing incoming and departing aircrafts and recording their registrations, operators, types and so on, unless I spot some lonely but attractive long haired and busty woman. I therefore make a diversion while focusing on how to neatly open the conversation.

    But no such lady was around to single out herself from the dismal lot of fellow stranded passengers.

    As some prize, I got a courtesy call from Captain Jessop, the 757 driver, whom I personally acquainted to. In the process, I am briefed on the latest meteorological developpments summarized by
    "Hope you're smart enough not to overload your agenda with appointments !!!" I then offered him to come along for a coffee, my treat. Captain Jessop excused himself by pointing out his crewmates and himself were understandably up to a big day and eager to get through it. However he asked
    "Still hve the same cell number ?"
    "Yes"
    "OK then, as soon I get something I keep you posted by SMS"
    We parted from each other and I finally sat beside an hefty pile of newspapers left behind. First, I scanned the ads of all sorts, then the crosswords, which proved very popular as every single puzzle was filled

    To write the least, I was puzzled to be left over with SuDoKus
    I scanned over the newspapers again for the SuDoKus and quickly understood why they were left untouched ! Brain teasing levels ranged from "Difficult" to "Demoniak" with "Devilish" and "Diabolik" in between according to who were the puzzle editors and for which news syndicates they worked for.

    To be continued

    Alain
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  • #2
    I finally managed to overcome a "Difficult" puzzle and altogether said
    "Oo-oo, c'est merveilleux" (it's marvellous")
    But a stern voice resounded from some nearby seat
    "Non c'est horrible, de toutes façons vous êtes un Amphibie (emfeebee)" (No it's terrible, anyway you are a batracian) while emphasing on the last word...
    Caught off-guard I turned my head on the right side to see who voiced this unusual but not unfamiliar statement. Clad in a strict black suit with assorted socks, shoes and tie over a white shirt was a slender man in his mid forties sitting upright. The conversation was quickly resumed in French by me.
    "Alors Mr SuDoKu-San, ah non ... son Illustrissime SuDoKu-Khan c'est mieux ... even though the Japanese Sir is more geographically appropriate than the Mongolian Conqueror !!!"
    (So Mister SuDoKu-San ... ah no, his honorable enlightened SuDoKu-Khan sounds better) How can you dare calling me a dummy ?! duh ..."
    "I have been observing you for a while. First, you pitifully looked for the easiest puzzles and went over the newspapers thrice before making up your mind. Needless to say you are not yet ready for the new Ka-Ku-Ro..."
    Me () ... Can I ask you a question ?
    SuDoKu-San : Please go ahead ...
    Me : Was your mother a teacher in mathematics ?
    SuDoKu-San : Yyeeessss
    Me : (sights-sobs proceed to next question !!!) Was your father a teacher in gym ?...
    The surely guy nodded again and got me up for more inner sobs and sights before proceeding to a next question which was
    " did you live somewhere halfway between Reims and Epernay ?"....
    Another affirmative nod and more sights !!! There we were, long ago during some boarding school days, I was supposedly taught maths by his mother, a rather nervous and impatiant one who often termed me as UN AMPHIBIE, a word normally meaning a batracian, but also synonimous of dummy in her parlance. Once, I tried my best to give her right by (unsuccessfully) imitating the 6 feet+ leap able Cameroonian buffalo Frog which also sounds like a bomb when croaking !!! Thanks to her, I came to hate maths and altogether shelve my dreams in being an Air France 707 captain
    Amidst my thoughts on how to deal with SuDoKu-San, I got a SMS, and looking to the outside revealed a fog blanket turning thinner and finally flight CBR 3133 was called for boarding. Time for sweet revenge was soon to ring

    To be continued

    Alain

    The boarding was processed in virtually no time and surpisingly I reached my seat, 28D, pretty quickly, despite the 757 was more or less 85 % full. About to seat and buckle I could not resist to voice a "Pick-A-Boo, guess who landed in 28F". You sure bet, SuDoKu-San who lost his surelyness as the mighty but nethertheless gruby 757 made him to swallow his pride ... Another one ill at ease with either classic or battered looking airliners ( and chuckling sideways)
    According to a french saying, revenge is a dish to be eaten cold. Personally I hope it will be frozen !!! I quickly sounded an "Heeeeeeee...." and went going
    "So SuDoKu-Khan enjoy the ride ! And relax, you escaped the dreaded middle-seat after all and we won't have to wage a war to determine who will colonize the arm-rest !!!! Now his turn to (sob, sight)
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    • #3
      The F/As made up for a typical mix, half were really nice ladies giving me right in picking up once more an aisle seat while their crewmates were almost time-up veterans. Push-back and starting the engines came in quick succession and provided SuDoKu-San with another source of annoyance to which I replied
      -"Yeah, you bet, you rightly seen flames gushing out from the engine exhaust ...."
      -(sight of worry ....)
      -"No danger, but since they are under Chapter 11, they are compelled to negociate their purshase on the best price to quality ratio avialable to them ...."
      -(more sights of dispair and muttering : "J'en peux plus !!! I can't take more)
      -(and resuming the description) As the traditional suppliers cut off their credit lines and as far fuel is concerned they came to deal with the local Air National Guard across the runways .....
      -(another round of muttered sights) "Pitié (Take pity) ....."
      -"As you will see by yourself, it will fly anyway, albeit on setting the engines on some Autorich to offset from the use of Jet A5 for combat aircrafts instead of A1, normally used by airliners such as our Boeing 757".
      The latter departed the gate as while one of the beauties concluded the safety demo, and reading signs through the window over SuDoKu-San's shoulders told me we were taxying to runway 18/36. Turning onto other taxyways told us the place was now under rush as six or so airliners trailed behind us and three others were already lining up in front of us. Our turn came pretty soon as a preceeding MD80 set herself on the pianokeys and almost imediately started her taking-off roll. While she was rotating, our 757 took her turn and it seemed just a matter of seconds before Capt Jessop pushed the throttles forward. Partly thanks to overpowering, it just took 41 seconds to the high-heeled Boeing to be airborne and punctuated by the clunk & chump tune of a gear tucking into its well, she started climbing at a nice 757 sharp angle.
      They
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      • #4
        The 757 was about to reach cruise level and it was about time to explore the content of the seat pocket. The most prized item was off course the safety card, another legacy of our 757's days as a Condor Flugdienst fleet member. Cash strapped CybRlines kept the original card, coming up as a folder in landscape & italian format. The mentions to "Condor" had been painstainkingly tapped with some commercial adhesive branded as Cyb-R-Lines. The other item was the inflight magazine, title of which was "your Cyb-R-ways' news". But since the airline had not much to report, the magazine had surrendered to , "muttering NonnNonnNonnn " SuDoKus which made up for about, even at least 4/5 of the content !!! As comforting news, no copy was stached in SuDoKu-San's seat pocket ....
        Few options were left in how to adress the problem, either I damped the copies allocated to seat 28D and E to SuDoKu-San, or I concealed the row's 3 copies. Not eager to provide him with an opportunity to both rebound and grasp his revenge, I chose the latter !!!!
        To end with, a third item named "Die SpeiseKarte" (the menu card) completed the litterature left to the passengers. SuDoKu-San emerged from his limbo and asked where was the inflight magazine. I replied a nice "There's none, remember the airline is under Chapter 11 and they surely have to purshase much more important items to ensure their operations !!!" duly punctuated by muttered chucklings ....
        In the meantime, the stewardesses walked back in forth from the galley. A hint some inflight services was processed with. But in fact and with no surprise, the catering was reduced to bare necessity ... Coming into mind for undergoing this one on an optimistic note was the song "The Bare Necessity" introducing BalooBear in Dyney's revisited version of "Jungle Book" and released in 1966 just a few month after Walt's death Back to the catering ! It consisted of crackers and a sealezd box of frozen mini carrots And I could not resist in sizing this additionnal opportunity to bug the SoDuKu-San.
        "Yeah I know their history .... "

        "They were originally purshased by ValueJet, now Air Tran, back in 1996 ...."
        Muttering "Oohh nooo ..."
        "They were later resold to UScare, sorry US Air, which already tried to damp them to me in 1997 between Philadelphia and Miami, on board a Boeing 737-200 (for info N229US)" then muttered
        Muttering : "Pitié (peetee-eh)"
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        • #5
          Finally the carrots were evacuated by one of the beauties, a tall blonde named Jessica and SuDoKu-San rescanned a "Nouvelles Frontières" (New Boundaries Travels) exchange voucher for his ownward flight home. He was booked on the weekly ABCjets 747 service and tentalizingly asked if I ever heard of this airline...
          "You bet !!! Sure I did They operate some hand-me-down 747s in very high density seating. I think they purshased this fleet from All Nippon Airways on the second hand market .... These aircrafts mostly used to shuttle between Tokyo and Sapporo, and they probably kept the high density seating prevailing for Japanese trunk domestic services. Hence the nickname I hear of them ...."
          "Hein ( huunh / uh in french) Quoi (Koowah translation What ?)"
          "Yes, they are termed as La Bétaillère (lah beytah-yeeR/the cattle wagon)"
          [sobs and mutters : Je craque ..](jeuh krak / I am cracking up or I can't take more)
          Resuming : "They are usually so late that when claiming to be on time, they say "We are within the day .... Besides, I must tell you which is the flagship's registration, it's just too funny ...."
          I was cut short by a resounding and pleading "Pitié" voiced as follow in some agonizing sequence : Peeeetyehehehe ..."
          Getting my composture of the never panicking British gentleman : "Aas you wish"
          Over these words, Cyb-R-lines'757 banked on her left and started her descent, then came the finals, concluded by a real kiss landing on runway 27R/09L. Taxy to gate was a lenghy affair allowing me to spot quite a few interesting visitors. The 757 reached then her gate at Termnal 2 where she parked alongside ABCjets' top flagship. Predominently finished in three tones of blue, the Jumbo was a good old model 100 registered G-LLOQ (phonetics of J'ai deux ailes au cul, translation : I got two wings on my ass...) I wish could duplicate the shouts of this amphibian on which Obi Wan Kenobi goes astride when runing after General Sidious in Star War III. I contended with
          " Aahh Pee-Wee-Wee-Wee ..."
          When the 757 came to a complete stop, I left SuDoKu-San going ahead and once outside I could not resist in singing "Have a bad day * Have a bad day * Have a bad day" while making my best to copy Daniel Powter ...

          The end

          Thanks for your patience and time taken to follow this mini-serie, your comments are welcome,till the next.

          Alain
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