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Employee Evaluation Form (joke R rated)
I know a couple people at work who could benifit from such honesty! 
Employee Evaluation
Name: ________________________ Date: __________________
Position: ___________________
Knowledge:
[ ] The Son of a B#tch Really Knows His S@%t!
[ ] Knows Just Enough To Be Dangerous.
[ ] Only Has Half a Brain and is Dangerous.
[ ] F$%king Brain Damaged, His Coffee Cup Has a Higher IQ.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Accuracy:
[ ] Does Excellent Work If Not Pre-occupied With Pu$$y.
[ ] Pretty Good; Only Occasionally Blows it Out His A$$.
[ ] Has to Take His Shoes Off To Count Higher Than Ten.
[ ] Couldn't Count His Balls And Get The Same Number Twice.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Attitude:
[ ] Extremely Cooperative (If You Kiss His A$$ Daily).
[ ] Brown Noser In Good Standing.
[ ] Often Pisses Off Co-Workers, Thinks He Owns the Damn Place
[ ] Doesn't Give A S#it, Never Did, Never Will.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reliability:
[ ] Really A Dependable C#$kSucker.
[ ] Works So Hard That He Has To Take An Extra Day Off Each Week.
[ ] Can Rely On Him To Be The First One Out The Door.
[ ] Totally F#$king Worthless.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Appearance:
[ ] Extremely Neat, Even Combs His Pubic Hair.
[ ] Looks Great On His Days Off.
[ ] Dirty, Filthy, Smelly Son Of a B#tch.
[ ] Flies Leave Fresh Dog S#it To Follow Him.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Performance:
[ ] Goes Like A Son Of A B#tch...If There's Money In It For Him.
[ ] Does All Kinds of Good S#it At Evaluation Time.
[ ] Works Well After An Enema.
[ ] Couldn't Do Less If He Were In A Coma.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Leadership:
[ ] Carries A Chain saw And Gets Good Results.
[ ] Macho Attitude, Commands Total Disgust.
[ ] Dog Fasted For Three Days Last Time He Brought Home Pork Chops.
[ ] Mother Teresa Told Him to Get F#$ked.
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I UNDERSTAND THAT I HAVE BEEN COUNSELED AND UNDERSTAND MY RIGHTS UNDER THE
PRIVACY ACT OF 1974. I FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I AM FUCKED UP AND WORTHLESS
AS A FOOTBALL BAT, AND I WILL MAKE SOME KIND OF ATTEMPT TO CORRECT MY
OBVIOUS DEFICIENCES.
_______________________________ Employee Signature (If He Can Write)
Employee Evaluation
Name: ________________________ Date: __________________
Position: ___________________
Knowledge:
[ ] The Son of a B#tch Really Knows His S@%t!
[ ] Knows Just Enough To Be Dangerous.
[ ] Only Has Half a Brain and is Dangerous.
[ ] F$%king Brain Damaged, His Coffee Cup Has a Higher IQ.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Accuracy:
[ ] Does Excellent Work If Not Pre-occupied With Pu$$y.
[ ] Pretty Good; Only Occasionally Blows it Out His A$$.
[ ] Has to Take His Shoes Off To Count Higher Than Ten.
[ ] Couldn't Count His Balls And Get The Same Number Twice.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Attitude:
[ ] Extremely Cooperative (If You Kiss His A$$ Daily).
[ ] Brown Noser In Good Standing.
[ ] Often Pisses Off Co-Workers, Thinks He Owns the Damn Place
[ ] Doesn't Give A S#it, Never Did, Never Will.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reliability:
[ ] Really A Dependable C#$kSucker.
[ ] Works So Hard That He Has To Take An Extra Day Off Each Week.
[ ] Can Rely On Him To Be The First One Out The Door.
[ ] Totally F#$king Worthless.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Appearance:
[ ] Extremely Neat, Even Combs His Pubic Hair.
[ ] Looks Great On His Days Off.
[ ] Dirty, Filthy, Smelly Son Of a B#tch.
[ ] Flies Leave Fresh Dog S#it To Follow Him.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Performance:
[ ] Goes Like A Son Of A B#tch...If There's Money In It For Him.
[ ] Does All Kinds of Good S#it At Evaluation Time.
[ ] Works Well After An Enema.
[ ] Couldn't Do Less If He Were In A Coma.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Leadership:
[ ] Carries A Chain saw And Gets Good Results.
[ ] Macho Attitude, Commands Total Disgust.
[ ] Dog Fasted For Three Days Last Time He Brought Home Pork Chops.
[ ] Mother Teresa Told Him to Get F#$ked.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I UNDERSTAND THAT I HAVE BEEN COUNSELED AND UNDERSTAND MY RIGHTS UNDER THE
PRIVACY ACT OF 1974. I FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I AM FUCKED UP AND WORTHLESS
AS A FOOTBALL BAT, AND I WILL MAKE SOME KIND OF ATTEMPT TO CORRECT MY
OBVIOUS DEFICIENCES.
_______________________________ Employee Signature (If He Can Write)
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