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Aaaaah dem pesky traffic cops

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  • Aaaaah dem pesky traffic cops

    While I was driving down the N1 the other day, (going a little faster than I Should have been) I passed under a bridge only to see a traffic-cop on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait.

    The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk, asked: "Runway too short?"

    To which I replied, "I'm late for work."

    To which he asked, "What do you do?"

    "I'm a rectum-stretcher," I responded.

    The traffic cop was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum-stretcher??"

    And just what does a rectum-stretcher do?" "Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger into a rectum, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."

    Then the cop asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot asshole?"

    To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind A bridge..."

    Speeding ticket: R250.00
    Court costs: R1000.00
    Look on traffic cop's face: P R I C E L E S S . . . . .
    RobB


  • #2
    That one was good. HAHAHAHAH!
    sigpic
    http://www.jetphotos.net/showphotos.php?userid=170

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    • #3
      LOL, very funny

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      • #4
        hahaha, lucky he didn't come out with the cuffs.

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        • #5
          That was good. Is that a true story?

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Bok269
            That was good. Is that a true story?
            Waddya mean "is that a true story" ? Of course it's true, would I lie ? We have some "unique" professionals here in South Africa - I mean proctology is a worldwide profession, how else do you think politicians and traffic cops were created ? Ask Robert McBride.

            Have fun.........................
            RobB

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            • #7
              Funny and bold at the same time. You must have some brass ones...
              Fly Raleigh-Durham International, with direct flights on Air Canada, AirTran, American Airlines, American Eagle, America West, Continental Airlines, Continental Express, Delta Airlines, Delta Connection, jetBlue, Northwest Airlines, Southwest Airlines, United Express and US Airways to:

              ATL, AUS, BWI, BOS, CHS, CLT, MDW, ORD, CVG, CLE, DFW, DTW, FLL, BDL, HOU, IND, LAS, LAX, LGW, MEM, MIA, MSP, BNA, EWR, MSY, JFK, LGA, ORF, MCO, PHL, PHX, PIT, STL, SLC, TPA, YYZ, DCA and IAD.

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              • #8
                Or he read it online?

                http://www.thehumorarchives.com/joke/Rectum_Stretcher
                Tanner Johnson - Owner
                twenty53 Photography

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                • #9
                  We have some "unique" professionals here in South Africa - I mean proctology is a worldwide profession
                  Rule number one....NEVER turn your back on a proctologist !
                  If it 'ain't broken........ Don't try to mend it !

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by brianw999
                    Rule number one....NEVER turn your back on a proctologist !
                    Patient: "Doc, I got a piece of soap stuck up me bum".
                    Proctologist" "That's life, boy".

                    Patrient: "Doc, what do you call a man with a rabbit stuck up his bum" ?
                    Proctologist: "Warren"
                    RobB

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