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  • EU English

    The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,which was the other possibility.

    As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

    In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

    In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

    Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

    Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

    By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

    During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

    Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

    Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas
    Last edited by RobinB; 2008-01-24, 10:39.
    RobB


  • #2
    Again .... opened up a topic posted by you and people in the office ask me why I am staring in the PC and laughing out loud!!

    Great one again, Rob!!
    My photos on Flickr www.flickr.com/photos/geridominguez

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    • #3
      That is not funny.






      Ok, iz qaite phunny.

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      • #4
        I em laffing mei ess off . Another great one Rob .

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        • #5
          Res Severa Verum Gaudium

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          • #6
            An oldie but goodie Rob.

            Andy

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            • #7
              RobinB - don't you want to apply for a position as head of strategic planning at Eskom? You'd be perfectly qualified with that language - and they wouldn't understand you anyway.
              warning: this post may contain traces of irony.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by el
                RobinB - don't you want to apply for a position as head of strategic planning at Eskom? You'd be perfectly qualified with that language - and they wouldn't understand you anyway.
                No problem, brushing up on my use of "EEEEEEeeeish" and taking lessons in Industrial Aerobics - you know the "dance" with one leg in the air and hopping around shouting the odds. Oh yes, "Sorry" allows one to screw up totally and utterly and keep my job.
                RobB

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by RobinB
                  No problem, brushing up on my use of "EEEEEEeeeish" and taking lessons in Industrial Aerobics - you know the "dance" with one leg in the air and hopping around shouting the odds. Oh yes, "Sorry" allows one to screw up totally and utterly and keep my job.
                  I suppose part-time will do fine. One hour a week should suffice to do more in one month than these chaps did in the past ten years.

                  Oh, and the year-end bonuses seem to be quite lucrative, especially when you do nothing.
                  warning: this post may contain traces of irony.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sounds like it could still be a good time to be moving on. With talent and money, you should be able to do well anywhere you go.

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