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How's this for a fractured fairytale? 
The Fable of the Horse and Chicken
Horse and Chicken were the best of friends.
They lived together on Farmer Brown's farm.
Now Farmer Brown, in the true style of Jed Clampett, had recently struck oil on his farm; but loved the old place too much to give up farming. He instead bought himself a red Callaway Corvette to celebrate his newfound riches, and continued life as he'd always lived it-- tending to his fields and animals.
One day, his most experienced old Horse and prized Chicken were grazing/pecking in the field when they spotted an open oil well. Being the curious little critters they were, they decided to go over and investigate. There were pools and puddles of oil here and there, and ol' Horse didn't notice one of them before it was too late.... he slipped and fell in. As slippery as the oil was, he couldn't get a grip on the shore of the giant puddle, and therefore couldn't get out.
Poor Chicken was a nervous soul, she squawked histerically: "Oh Horse, oh Horse; whatever will I do?! You'll drown if I leave you there, but you're far too large and heavy for me to pull out!"
Ol' Horse, being the calm and intelligent fellow that he was, said: "Listen carefully Chicken; you must break into Farmer Brown's house, steal his keys, find a rope, tie the rope to the Corvette, back it up here, and use the Corvette to pull me to safety".
So Chicken did just that: she broke into Farmer Brown's house, stole his keys, found a rope, tied the rope to the Corvette, backed it up to the oil well, and used the Corvette to pull Horse to safety.
They hugged and lived happily on after.
************
A few weeks later, Horse and Chicken found another new open-oil-well in one of their pastures. Being the curious little critters they are, they went over to investigate. This time, clumsy Chicken slipped and fell into the well. She frantically squawked: "Horse, Horse, I've fallen in.... you must break into Farmer Brown's house, steal his keys, find a rope, tie the rope to the Corvette, back it up here, and use the Corvette to saveeee me!"
Ol' Horse began to gallop toward Farmer Brown's house... but then he stopped. Being the calm and intelligent fellow that he was, he thought for a minute... then walked back toward the oil well.
Chicken freaked: "Horse! What are you doing?! Are you not my best friend?! Will you not get the Corvette and pull me to safety?!"
Horse paid her no heed: he simply straddled the oil well, lowered his enormous horse-sized member, and stated: "Chicken, grab on to my big floppy donkey d!ck, and I'll pull you to safety!"
So, Chicken grabbed on to Horse's enormous member, and he pulled her to safety.
They hugged and lived happily on after.
***** And the moral of the story? (think about it, then scroll down) *****
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It's quite simple really.....
"When you're as hung as a horse, you don't need a Corvette to pick up a chick!"
The Fable of the Horse and Chicken
Horse and Chicken were the best of friends.
They lived together on Farmer Brown's farm.
Now Farmer Brown, in the true style of Jed Clampett, had recently struck oil on his farm; but loved the old place too much to give up farming. He instead bought himself a red Callaway Corvette to celebrate his newfound riches, and continued life as he'd always lived it-- tending to his fields and animals.
One day, his most experienced old Horse and prized Chicken were grazing/pecking in the field when they spotted an open oil well. Being the curious little critters they were, they decided to go over and investigate. There were pools and puddles of oil here and there, and ol' Horse didn't notice one of them before it was too late.... he slipped and fell in. As slippery as the oil was, he couldn't get a grip on the shore of the giant puddle, and therefore couldn't get out.
Poor Chicken was a nervous soul, she squawked histerically: "Oh Horse, oh Horse; whatever will I do?! You'll drown if I leave you there, but you're far too large and heavy for me to pull out!"
Ol' Horse, being the calm and intelligent fellow that he was, said: "Listen carefully Chicken; you must break into Farmer Brown's house, steal his keys, find a rope, tie the rope to the Corvette, back it up here, and use the Corvette to pull me to safety".
So Chicken did just that: she broke into Farmer Brown's house, stole his keys, found a rope, tied the rope to the Corvette, backed it up to the oil well, and used the Corvette to pull Horse to safety.
They hugged and lived happily on after.
************
A few weeks later, Horse and Chicken found another new open-oil-well in one of their pastures. Being the curious little critters they are, they went over to investigate. This time, clumsy Chicken slipped and fell into the well. She frantically squawked: "Horse, Horse, I've fallen in.... you must break into Farmer Brown's house, steal his keys, find a rope, tie the rope to the Corvette, back it up here, and use the Corvette to saveeee me!"
Ol' Horse began to gallop toward Farmer Brown's house... but then he stopped. Being the calm and intelligent fellow that he was, he thought for a minute... then walked back toward the oil well.
Chicken freaked: "Horse! What are you doing?! Are you not my best friend?! Will you not get the Corvette and pull me to safety?!"
Horse paid her no heed: he simply straddled the oil well, lowered his enormous horse-sized member, and stated: "Chicken, grab on to my big floppy donkey d!ck, and I'll pull you to safety!"
So, Chicken grabbed on to Horse's enormous member, and he pulled her to safety.
They hugged and lived happily on after.
***** And the moral of the story? (think about it, then scroll down) *****
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It's quite simple really.....
"When you're as hung as a horse, you don't need a Corvette to pick up a chick!"
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