Funnybone moomoo

[safetyfirst]

I always wondered about flight-deck humour. I mean, its obviously dangerous if you giggle and wriggle and forget to set the flaps, but is there a place for humour on the bridge? I remember years ago when naviator5 (Delta MD8 was a kid, he said on this site that they sometimes counted the number of pax with bandy legs and I believe he gave a figure, can't remember what, which was the greatest number of bandy-legged pax ever to have been observed boarding a flight. Personally, as a possible passenger who lacks bandy legs, I am not thrilled by this kind of pilotorial dalliance, I think you ought to be out there polishing the wheels or something, not poking fun at your betters.

So I would like to know, please, if there are actually any bandy-legged pilots, or if anyone can recall seeing such a person, four gold rings and legs like a hoop? My mother-in-law had bandy legs, but she was not a pilot, or at least I jolly well hope she was not. Because I am concerned that a number of pilots might actually have bandy legs but are concealing the truth from us. Please be honest in your replies here, people.

[SYDCBRWOD]

I always wondered about flight-deck humour. I mean, its obviously dangerous if you giggle and wriggle and forget to set the flaps, but is there a place for humour on the bridge? I remember years ago when naviator5 (Delta MD8 was a kid, he said on this site that they sometimes counted the number of pax with bandy legs and I believe he gave a figure, can't remember what, which was the greatest number of bandy-legged pax ever to have been observed boarding a flight. Personally, as a possible passenger who lacks bandy legs, I am not thrilled by this kind of pilotorial dalliance, I think you ought to be out there polishing the wheels or something, not poking fun at your betters.

So I would like to know, please, if there are actually any bandy-legged pilots, or if anyone can recall seeing such a person, four gold rings and legs like a hoop? My mother-in-law had bandy legs, but she was not a pilot, or at least I jolly well hope she was not. Because I am concerned that a number of pilots might actually have bandy legs but are concealing the truth from us. Please be honest in your replies here, people.

EC has a younger brother...How sweet...

[mzk49o1]

My legs are so bandy its a sget fest.

[Deadstick]

Here we go. Hell in a handbasket.

[safetyfirst]

safety

My legs are so bandy its a sget fest.

Thank you so much for your funny reply. Have you tried getting, you know, help?

[mzk49o1]

Thank you so much for your funny reply. Have you tried getting, you know, help?

Define help.

[P3_Super_Bee]

Only know personally one person. And 20 some odd years ago, he had his legs broken and reset to fix the problem. So I'm thinking it's pretty rare thing now a days..

[AndyToop]

I thought bandy legs was a pre-requisite t becoming a pilot - or at least on a Boeing - so you could ensure sufficient room to move the yoke.

It was the improving health care systems in Europe during the post war years which reduced the incidence of bandy leggedness that led airbus to implement the side stick!

Sorry - I thought this was common knowledge

[safetyfirst]

Bls

Yes, thank you for asking me to define help. Help, can only be given where a pilot accepts his or her difficulties with their legs and actually ASKS for help. The helping Bandy Legs Therapist nowadays has a range of comforting behaviour and analytical strategies which can help restore confidence and self-esteem to the bandy-legged aviator. Help consists of deep listening, without judgement and in total confidence, to anything the poor hoop-limbed flyer has to say. Help means listening deeply and responding with sensitive and encouraging comments, allowing the confused pilot to express their feelings about side-stick syndrome, Boeing Bullshit, Federal Ferality, the necessity for flicking bogies (boogers in US) at the management, and anything else that worries them without applying criticism of any kind. Help means holding their Bandy Legged Pilot in Deep Respect as a professional expert doing an almost impossibly difficult job with courage and dedication. Help means just listening with humility and open-minded willingness to learn. Help means the helper is NOT ALLOWED to later discuss or mention or refer to anything that is said while help is being given. Does that sound OK for Helping with BLS? (Boeing Lateral Silliness)

Of course, many pilots will assert that pilots are sane and powerful people who never need help, fully in control,and numerate to the nth degree, so they don't need help anyway,- they like their bandy legs. Except those who doze off with their laptops and miss the airport and those whose wives/husbands/kids got arrested last night and those who failed to notice the difference between NDB and BLS so they crashed into a mountain because they were preoccupired with family difficulties, and those who forgot to set the goddam flaps because they were preoccupied with not BANDY LEGS but Ladies' Legs so they crashed onto a road and all those who overshot the runway because they failed to follow procedure and then panicked because they were preoccupoied with ARGUMENT; but all of whom would have benefitted their dead and maimed passengers by honestly and humbly seeking help for their difficulties and confusions as part of their Professional Practice.

So I hope that answers your question about what help is and what it is for. I have forty years experience of trying to help myself to help others, so criticize and ask away if you like, all questions answered here without bullshit.

PS I noticed lately that my legs are looking really quite bandy. . .

NOte to Admin: this is an off-topic post, it is humbly rendered and it is essential that it remains in this forum so that replies remain OFF-TOPIC, INFORMAL and RELAXED. My cat eats peanuts!

[brianw999]

Nothing wrong with bandy legs. One of my mates in the ambulance service would never be able to catch a pig in a passage, his knees are at least 18 inches apart. !!

Mind you, he is 5'6" tall and rides a Honda Pan European rapid response motorcycle !

....and if you're ever seriously injured you'd want him to be one of the ones to come to you. Shit hot paramedic.

[mzk49o1]

tl;dr

mkay.