A little joke.....

[Deadstick]

Ok,to everyone out there,especially people I offended,Im truely sorry.I should have thought what I was posting before I did.I get like this sometimes.I post it then regret it later.

Not offended, and hopefully I/we have helped you to understand a little about racism. We all post things sooner or later we regret.

[LH-B744]

@LX-A343: his name is Bülent Ceylan. He is good... seen him performing a traditional Turkish dance suddenly switching to a traditional Bavarian dance without changing the melody and instruments.

Yes, that's him. But I was wrong, he is from Mannheim, don't think they want to be called Swabians. But I am from "North of Frankfurt", so, which region is it where he comes from?

[DAIRD]

What is exactly "North of Frankfurt?" Hamburg? Ringkoebing? Oslo?...I'm living near Bad Vilbel, some 20km north-east of Frankfurt, which belongs to Rhein-Main-area. So my language goes more to that of Heinz Schenk (you sure know the little old man of the TV-pub "Blue Ram" ...hehe) so the tongue they are speaking down in Mannheim (ca. 80km south of Frankfurt) is more that of Helmut Kohl, Boris Becker and Steffi Graf (you can hear it, even they are out for years). Always funny...
In the Bundeswehr they used Swabians as radio-operators, when they had to transmit secret informations no other should hear....

[BoeingKing77]

By the way, maybe you should change that racist avatar. I can think of at least one forum member who might be very offended by this (reference to cavemen that is).

I have nothing against the AF.my dad was in the AF up in cold Alaska for 2 winters.

[brianw999]

For those who don't know...(WARNING >>>> ADULT LANGUAGE and humour )

Kevin "Bloody" Wilson...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ESG7ossRNY

( Nigel is Kev's best friend... and an aborigine ! )

..........................................................................

Roy "Chubby" Brown....

VERY ADULT, Non PC ...but is it rascist.....or is Chubby trying to make a point ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sYwATBRu_c

[BoeingKing77]

Oh, I wasn't worried about you offending someone in the AF - I was worried you might offend some of the cavemen here.

ok.Anybody else here think those commercials are retarded??

[Deadstick]

ok.Anybody else here think those commercials are retarded??

I like the gekko.

[canair67]

As others have stated...just a joke guys....

What is an half empty can of Molson Canadian on the side of the road?
- A rare Indian artifact

Where do you hide a welfare cheque from a native?
In a pair of work boots because natives don't work........

[BoeingKing77]

I like the gekko.

in my opinion the only thing thats better then retarded.

As others have stated...just a joke guys....

What is an half empty can of Molson Canadian on the side of the road?
- A rare Indian artifact

Where do you hide a welfare cheque from a native?
In a pair of work boots because natives don't work........

what the crap is Molson Canadian?

[RobinB]

Wow "people" - I know I have not been trawling the forum for a while - "stumbled" onto this thread and shook my head in wonder - why are many people so SENSITIVE. One can seemingly get away with telling ETHNIC jokes but when a joke is (mis) construed as RACIST, the wheels fall off...... For me, a joke is a play on words and the more skillful the play on words, the better the joke . Introducing characters into the joke to "set a scene" is usually what happens and those "characters" are you and me, irrespective of what race, religion or ethnic group we belong to. Find me a joke that does not involve humans ?

"Everyone" takes the mickey out of the Irish - do they care ? No, they take the piss out of the English. in many instances the "plot" is common, but the characters differ, depending on who and where the joke is told.

For me personally, I don't give a tinkers toss if anyone takes the piss out of me via a joke -racist, etchic, religious - I just don't care - the ONLY criteria I set - "did it make me laugh ?"

So, "joke tellers" - there was this Indian, an Irishman, a "Lungu" (that's me, a white South African as referred to by my black South African countrymen), a Mexican, an Arab, a Jew, a Catholic Pope, a Russian Mafia Boss, a Japanenese gisha, a blonde, a Nigerian and a Zimbabwean gay activist all sitting in a bar with a pint of our local brew when the Indian pipes up ".................."

See what I mean ? Get it ? YES ? - Great, you have a life afterall............

[brianw999]

...and then there's...

THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super....'


On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.

'Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.'

She calmly turned her head and said,
'In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.'

To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,
'Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray-up, Bitch'

[HB-IHC]

...and then there's...



THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT

My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.



As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super....'





On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.



'Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.'



She calmly turned her head and said,

'In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.'



To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,

'Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray-up, Bitch'

Did he manage to get everyone back up off the floor and give oxygen to those who had just about killed themselves through hysterical laughing before landing?

[leon]

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office
and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances,
and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.

I don't think you understand.
Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.

I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland.

Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.

Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.

Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.

What makes you think that?
I got proof.

What kind of proof?SHE IS GOING TO POISON ME !!!!
She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:

~~~ Polish Remover~~~

[DAIRD]

One of my Jewish jokes favorites:

Two Jewish men are sitting in a wonderful deli frequented almost exclusively by Jews in the Jewish section of town. They are talking among themselves in Yiddish. A Chinese waiter comes up and in fluent and impeccable Yiddish asks them if everything is okay, can he get them anything, and so forth. The Jewish men are dumbfounded. "My God, where did he learn such perfect Yiddish?" they both think. After they pay the bill they ask the manager of the store, an old friend also fluent in Yiddish, "Where did your waiter learn such fabulous Yiddish?" The owner looks around and leans in so no one will hear and says, "Shhhh. He thinks we're teaching him English."

[brianw999]

Another jewish one...

Solly comes upon Hymie in the high street and says....

"Hymie, I just heard the terrible news about the fire that destroyed your clothing factory"

Hymie replies...

"Solly...hush......that's tomorrow"