National Lampoon's Israeli Vacation: Airport Security Scene

[Gabriel]

TeeVee: Check out the post in the off-topic forum.

That is fascinating stuff (to me at least). Have you been following it up there or you just dropped the bomb and walked away?

Also a subject that causes emotional distress to me and makes me feel like selling all my cars. The prospect of losing all my assets (except perhaps the homestead home) and having to declare bankruptcy, and not being able to pay for my kid's college or have a decent life after retirement, and all because I left my car at the dealer's for an oil change, is terrifying.

[3WE]

yeah, that's about right!

TeeVee: Check out the post in the off-topic forum.

Or would Roe vs. Wade be more interesting?

[TeeVee]

So Hamas is now attacking Israel with suitcases and American tourists instead of rockets? And this is minimal sarcasm?

Or is Israel attacking its own people with reckless, disproportionate responses to latent and contained threats?

says the expert on all things including security in the most attacked country on the planet.

the most inept israeli security guard can likely run circles around you mentally. that is not to say they are all smart or perfect, but compared to you...

i suppose our resident expert on all things would have likely spent some time examining the shell; referencing a handy dandy QRH which identifies every type of ordnance ever produced by anyone; determine its approximate age; factor in the environmental conditions the shell had been in for the past "x" years, utilize sophisticated, advance mathematical and statistical formulae to determine within an airbus degree of certainty the likelihood of said shell exploding; calculating (again, to an airbus degree of certainty) to blast field in the event said shell explodes; identify the most appropriate exits to be utilized and the best most expedient routes to be taken by escaping non-victims; taking a few minutes to breath deep and exhale slowly before making the softest, most benign, with almost android-like lack of emotion announcement directed ONLY at the non-victims theretofore identified asking them to kindly, slowly, using the utmost care not to appear worried, to GET THE EFF OUT!

yeah, that's about right!

[BoeingBobby]

Did TeeVee have a mask on when they brought the shell into the airport? Asking for a friend.

[3WE]

So Hamas is now attacking Israel with suitcases and American tourists instead of rockets? And this is minimal sarcasm?

Or is Israel attacking its own people with reckless, disproportionate responses to latent and contained threats?

Please quit playing deaf that the general public likely panicked on their own.

Never mind, the Israeli’s are screw ups and greatly in need of your updated procedures and oversight. They should be contacting you shortly.

[Gabriel]

Is Israel attacking its own people with reckless, disproportionate responses to latent and contained threats?

I don't know. Do you?

[Evan]

Then again, there are rules of thumb there: if a warning sounds, you have X-seconds/minutes to get to a bunker (based on distance from Palestine).

So Hamas is now attacking Israel with suitcases and American tourists instead of rockets? And this is minimal sarcasm?

Or is Israel attacking its own people with reckless, disproportionate responses to latent and contained threats?

[3WE]

It takes as much as a peasant seeing the object and shouting "BOMB, BOMB!!!!". That, and a chain reaction.

Mild sarcasm:
I blame New York tourists.

Minimal sarcasm:
My money is on crowd misbehavior- Israel has mandatory military service, and the culture seems pretty strong on procedures and team-compliance and I imagine they make intelligent PA announcements

Then again, there are rules of thumb there: if a warning sounds, you have X-seconds/minutes to get to a bunker (based on distance from Palestine).

[Evan]

Do you know that that's how it happened?

No, but I'm prone to speculation.

[Gabriel]

Not an airport-wide, stampede inducing announcement.

Do you know that that's how it happened? Panic is susceptible to spread by means other than a stampede-inducing announcement. It takes as much as a peasant seeing the object and shouting "BOMB, BOMB!!!!". That, and a chain reaction.

[Evan]

says the expert on EVERYTHING.

well, these guys may know a bit more about the stuff: http://www.forthoodsentinel.com/edit...3a5b94c2a.html

even picking it up can cause detonation. and dont tell me "well they picked it up, packed it, transported it etc etc. if your grandmother was there, would you have said, "hey granny, no need to worry. go ahead and play with the unexploded shell. you'll be just fine?"

Says the expert on not reading my posts. So I have to drag out the bold type again…

As I said, a discreet and orderly evacuation of the immediate area was needed. Not an airport-wide, stampede inducing announcement. People were injured and not by the thing itself (which somehow failed to detonate).

[3WE]

says the expert on EVERYTHING.

well, these guys may know a bit more about the stuff: http://www.forthoodsentinel.com/edit...3a5b94c2a.html

even picking it up can cause detonation. and dont tell me "well they picked it up, packed it, transported it etc etc. if your grandmother was there, would you have said, "hey granny, no need to worry. go ahead and play with the unexploded shell. you'll be just fine?"

If the shell had blown up, I can just imagine the admonishment and suggestions for procedural overhaul that would be given.

[TeeVee]

There is nothing about to detonate the thing. An explosion is not imminent.
And, obviously, the airport wasn't under attack.

says the expert on EVERYTHING.

well, these guys may know a bit more about the stuff: http://www.forthoodsentinel.com/edit...3a5b94c2a.html

even picking it up can cause detonation. and dont tell me "well they picked it up, packed it, transported it etc etc. if your grandmother was there, would you have said, "hey granny, no need to worry. go ahead and play with the unexploded shell. you'll be just fine?"

[3WE]

…In Germany, when they come upon an old unexploded 500lb or 1000lb bomb from WWII, they conduct an orderly evacuation…

So, in Germany, tourists occasionally bring 500 or 1000lb antique bombs that they’ve found into the airport with their luggage?

[Evan]

Now, as to how it was handled, I imagine procedures were followed.

If so, those procedures seriously need to be reconsidered.
Also, an unexploded shell is not a bomb.
In Germany, when they come upon an old unexploded 500lb or 1000lb bomb from WWII, they conduct an orderly evacuation, not a spontaneous pandemonium.
There is nothing about to detonate the thing. An explosion is not imminent.
And, obviously, the airport wasn't under attack.